chat with ben blum

me: your lying this must be a lie

Ben: this is the other ben blum

i'm a lawyer in cincinnati

mostly malpractice

who the hell are you, and what's your work-related injury

me: i ate my paint

i want to sue

Ben: honey, we're going to be millionaires
 me: i knew it was the paint companys fault

Ben: this is america. it's always someone's fault.

me: they should have said "dont eat the paint"

you're a good lawyer

i will fuck you after we win this

Ben: deal.

also, hook me up with some of that paint, i hear it's chalky but delicious.
 me: it is

smooth and chalky

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