14.7.10

"tao lin"

tao lin is a pain in the ass


me: ali lukans
3:27 AM give her back!
Tao: she's not here
3:31 AM me: oh i thought you stole her
i havent seen her in a long time.
3:32 AM Tao: i think her friend from chicago or something is staying w/ her
me: you dont live together?
Tao: no
3:33 AM me: i am mistaken
i want to sue a store that caught me shoplifting improperly
3:34 AM could i get away with that?
Tao: maybe
me: i didnt leave the store
or get charged
i feel like i could get some money out of the situation
Tao: do you have xanax or klonopin
3:35 AM me: i told them the reason i did that was because i was on klonopin
do you like benzos
Tao: if you want to sell or trade me some benzos...that'd be nice
me: well i have this bad anxiety disorder
3:36 AM i think ali lukans has klonapins though
Tao: yeah
i can trade you addy for xanny/klonoppy
me: i cant take those
anymore
Tao: i can trade you books
me: i used to do alot of cocaine
3:37 AM so now uppers give me panic attacks
i just got a bunch of new books
how many klonapins would it take for you to link me on your blog?
3:38 AM Tao: lol...
one link in one blog post?
me: or a link in your links section
Tao: for how long
what about your own advertisement
me: FOREVER
Tao: for 2 weeks, one ad on the sidebar
me: i cant afford that
3:39 AM Tao: ill put an ad that you create on my sidebar, a square one, for 10 klonopin for 1 week
wait, 15
me: your making this transaction difficult you know
no way
Tao: bro...that's a really good deal
it's a really good deal
3:40 AM me:

your blog isnt perez hiltons...BRO


Tao: bro...15 shitty ass klonopin
me: plus i cant give you that many
im just trying to up my hits
Tao: up your rx bro
bro...you're passing on a really good deal
ask anyone, feel free to come back to me within 2 days
3:41 AM me: my doc wont do it bro
why dont you get an rx?
are you addicted?
Tao: ill link your blog on my twitter account, leaving it there for 48 hours, for 5 klonopin
no i just want some for when i see bret easton ellis
and some other situations
i don thave health insurance
3:42 AM i have 3100 followers
me: you could get medicade
Tao: im down for medicade
3:43 AM me: i dont think id see you before you see bret easton ellis i am in the suburbs now
Tao: oh damn
im giving you mad good deals on the ads
3:44 AM me: yo if i wasnt low and actually in need of them and didnt have to pay to take the train then id consider it ali lukans will give you many
you can swim in them
Tao: i just want like 10
3:45 AM me: its the end of the month
3:46 AM ill see if i can find sime others
who have benzos
ok
Tao: sweet
3:47 AM how's ellen franes
frances
me: shes happy about her baby and life
Tao: nice
3:48 AM me: ok im gona go draw maybe i will draw you
byee
Tao: if you draw me
and do shit about me
i can news feed you on my blog
peace
3:50 AM me: can i write something that is like this conversation presented as fiction
along with a drawing
will that offend you
Tao: if you post this gchat, review my books, and draw something, ill news feed it
review something of mine
me: deal
3:51 AM nitee
Tao: peace




I read "bed" it was cool


here is a drawing representing my newly formed friendship with tao lin


2 comments:

chrysler5thavenue said...

saw a link to this on Tao Lin's blog. think you negotiated yourself a good deal, especially considering you got to keep your drugs.

alfie said...

thanks! i think so too