19.7.10

oH PLEASE HELP ME









sarah palin set women back by about 200 years. i am so sick of her. actually even writing this and giving her these words is disgraceful to me. so i will stop now. i am confused once again about

life

and art. everything is so fleeting. i think i've always chosen the hardest way to live life.
i mean come on

art?

how fickle, how fleeting how non existent.
but i don't think i can do anything else
at this point its become a compulsion.
if i am even well known enough decades from now
and some critic writes about something i did. he will have it all wrong. there will be no specific methodologies.
i am not inspired by iconography especially the kinds all around me. i am surrounded by branding. i should brand myself.
this critic who probably never even picked up a paint brush will say something about my anti conformity by using conformity. or something about me being like alice neel because i left a "booming art scene in new york city.
the truth is in my mind. new york city is dead. i have been kidding myself
i have been running around on its rotting corpse for years.
and don't think this to be offensive because this is just my world. the only person who sees all this is me. and by now people may have guessed i am a raging narcissist. forever tortured by myself and in love with myself at the same time.

1 comment:

ted said...

people are of small, delicate interest to other people.